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Thursday, July 14, 2011

Terror Attack Response Handbook – Indian Edition

Terror Attack Response Handbook – Indian Edition

  1. News media exploitation. Interview bystanders who wants their minute of fame and provide a torrent of unreliable news coverage, complimented with dull, shaky, grainy amateur mobile phone videos and images Create a scenario of dreary chaos and drama, play suitable background music.Increase ratings.

  2. Politicians Reactions. A useful opportunity for every level of political establishment to emphasize their voice , with wet eyes with superfluous words fresh out of the thesaurus, every word is to be sensationalized by the news media. Make sure political youth icons (ages from 40 to 50) get enough coverage.

  3. Investigation. This is were the best of the countries law enforcement and intelligence is put to test with the least of resources and constant huddles from every political establishment, finally to be mocked by the various media and citizens even though they have succeeded in their obligations.

  4. Political Blame Game. A sequel to the above mentioned Reactions, where blames are placed everywhere possible, from intelligence to governance to religious ideologies.Again make sure future minister candidates get enough air time.

  5. Praise. World praises victimized City's “indomitable spirit”.The praise redeeming an average citizens need to value another's life, or the county's dignity as much as the need to keep the stock market in good shape, and continue life as nothing happened. So there is no economic loss to the world elite, reducing the pressure on an already gold digging sloth of a government to bring justice and self respect back to the country's hurt.This step won't be suitable for victims of the tragedy.

  6. Media and Celebrity voices: Bombard every form of news media with celebrities discussing and condemning the acts with hour long debates and hypothetical situations. Insert ads of other celebrity endorsed cosmetics,junk food, investment systems and bottled soda. Scroll Cricket scores in the bottom. 

  7. Citizen Response. Show the world, especially the internet, through social networking sites like Facebook, twitter and Google+ ( now serving only an  technologically elite crowd ) and of course blogs like this, that you have done your part and have a guilt free conscious unless you are one of the victims. Don't do anything that can cause a little discomfort , continue breaking laws, and paying bribes more often than taxes.

  8. Citizen compliance. All citizens should exchange intelligence, common sense and any nationalist emotions and believe whatever the cream of the advertised media leads us to believe.

  9. Continuity. Redo Step 1 to Step 9 till for at least three to four weeks or when Step 10 presents itself.

  10. Amnesia. The 'attack' is old news now, replace the “breaking news” section with new discovered scams, political controversies, a hospitalized film star or celebrity gossip.


Raghav said...

We get amnesia for everything.for inflations.. everyone forgets about the parliament attack or ajmal kasab

Videv said...

its he last step in the hand book...;)

Durlov Baruah said...

Nice read.